Putting the "gum" in "argument."

If you want to write things in gum, go here.

Signed, Your Friend,

When Vladimir Putin found his threel on Blueberry Heel...

... it was pretty surreal...



... and Goldie Hawn loved it.

Via Bloggingheads. That was uploaded to YouTube in 2010. Some fundraiser. When? I don't know. Maybe you can figure it out from the shiny happy faces of the various Hollywoodland creatures.

The camera fixes on Kevin Costner, chewing gum and head-bobbing, so... along with the centrality of Goldie, I'd guess 1996. But Putin didn't become president of Russia until 2000, so I'll say 2000.

By the way, do you know what singer put out the first recorded version of "Blueberry Hill"? It wasn't Fats Domino, whose hit came out in 1956. The original version is from 1940.

"I just got a haircut, and it's short enough that I can no longer play with my hair."

"What can I do instead?"

You might think this is an opportunity to how to avoid nervous, compulsive behavior, but here is someone trying to get new ideas for fidgeting.

Temporary fixes I've used in the past include playing with hair elastics worn around a wrist and squeezing small plushies/stuffed animals, but these tend to loose their appeal quickly with me. Knitting also quells this urge, but it's not really an option during my work day. Chewing gum is also out due to TMJ.

"Rescued kidnapping victim Elizabeth Smart said Wednesday she understands why some human trafficking victims don't run."

"Smart said she 'felt so dirty and so filthy' after she was raped by her captor, and she understands why someone wouldn't run 'because of that alone.'"

Remarks made at a Johns Hopkins event that predated the story of the escape of the Cleveland victims.

"I thought, 'Oh, my gosh, I'm that chewed up piece of gum, nobody re-chews a piece of gum, you throw it away.' And that's how easy it is to feel like you know longer have worth, you know longer have value," Smart said. "Why would it even be worth screaming out? Why would it even make a difference if you are rescued? Your life still has no value."

Speaking of bubbles, Bazooka Bubble Gum is ending its Bazooka Joe comics.

"New inserts will feature brainteasers, like a challenge to list 10 comic book heroes named after animals, or activities, like instructions on folding the insert into an airplane."

Here's a brainteaser: What was the name of Bazooka Joe's sidekick and what distinctive clothing did he wear?

Mort, the character with a red turtleneck forever pulled up under his nose — he was a boy with voice but no mouth. He always seemed to me to represent a central duality of man: We wish to be heard, but we fear being misunderstood. Have I nailed it? Duality?

So asks WaPo columnist Gene Weingarten, interviewing Jay Lynch, the main Bazooka Joe jokewriter, who says his literary influences are Henry James and Thomas Aquinas. Lynch answers:

Jay: Sure. Why not? There’s a question, though, because in 1980, they pulled his turtleneck down, and showed his entire face, and changed his name to Red. That lasted a year or so, then they pulled it back up, and he became Mort again.

Me: Wow. What was that about?

Jay: No idea.

Me: Why did Bazooka Joe have an eye patch?

Jay: I never asked. I always assumed it was a terrible bubble gum accident.